itsy bitsy spider my ass!

So, I must be bored, because I have spent the past 30 min. researching spiders in Kentucky. The two who made my acquaintance today on the patio were very large and very scary. If I am to continue to frequent such visitors, I would like to know who they are, or more importantly, will I die if they bite me.

Unfortunately, I can't say without a shadow of a doubt what kind they were, as none of the pictures on UK's critter files website match their description.

I have now stared at enough spiders to sleep knee deep in nightmares for the rest of the weekend. Hell, I might as well go rent Arachnophobia and make a night of it... or not.